Side effects

Those words sound so innocuous. When I used to think of side effects, I thought, a headache, maybe some nausea - you know - minor issues that are easy to overlook and ignore. I have come to find that side effects are not so simple or easily discounted.
I told my favorite husband on Sunday that I don't know how much more of this I can take. In that moment, between tears, I fully meant it. I just didn't think that I could take much more. I don't know if it was the pain or feeling sorry for myself, but Sunday was hard. I can't even describe what is so bad about the side effects. Maybe it is the sheer quantity of them-all piled on at once with no relief. Maybe its the emotional aspect of going through chemo and knowing that I am doing this to myself - I am to blame for these effects.
I am happy to report that I feel much better today. I'm not 100 percent, but I feel so much better, and no longer poised at the brink of despair. :) I just have to remember my mantra - if I can hang on just a day or two, everything will be so much better!
I have my oncologist appointment tomorrow, and will let you know how that goes. For now, I am just so happy to be feeling better (even though I am still 'couch bound' for the most part).
Now I promise - no more whining until the next treatment!