Call from the Doctor

My gynecologic oncologist called me on her first day back from vacation! Wow - what service and dedication. I am impressed. (did I mention how glad I am that I switched docs? :) )

She said that, although she had not reviewed the slides herself yet, cancerous cells were found in the needle biopsy. No big surprise there - it was expected. She didn't say what type were found, but based on the treatment she is suggesting, I believe it is ovarian cancer. Again - no big surprise there!

She wants me to start on Doxil as my next line of chemotherapy, starting next Thursday. It is not set in stone yet, as her office needs to call me to finalize everything. However, this ball is now rolling - and I look forward to having an active treatment regimen going.

I again asked her about surgery, and she again said that it is not recommended at this time. I just hate that I can feel the tumor - or at least feel the things it is pushing out of its way. I wish it were gone. I hope that Doxil shrinks it and the other small growths in my abdomen, down to nothing.

I've been on a bit of an emotional roller coaster since I talked to her - I won't lie about that! Alternately feeling happy that I will be having treatment, and terrified of the treatment and side effects. The good news is that this chemo is reportedly not as energy-sapping as the previous type I was on. I am trying not to worry about the side effects until I know what they will be for me - but it is hard not to. One day at a time, right?

I'll update again when this is all finalized.

CT guided needle biopsy

The biopsy went well. It was truly an interesting procedure. Unfortunately, it was not painless. They didn't knock me out. The nurse said that she gave me an 'anti anxiety' drug and a strong pain killer. I asked her if I looked anxious ;) she said no. Most of the procedure was painless - however, there was a point where I really felt the needle deep inside of me. I asked the doctor later, where the needle was during the time of pain. He thought it was when he was breaching the wall of the tumor. It felt exactly what you would expect an eight inch needle inside you to feel like. Luckily, it was short lived pain.

He did have to repeat the procedure when they found he hadn't collected enough cells the first time. Ouch again! Good thing I'm tough. I remember the whole thing, but it was not traumatic.

Then back up to my room where they observed me for a couple of hours, gave me lunch (the less said about lunch the better!), and then I got to go home! They should have the results in about a week or so. I'll call my doc (who is on vacation this week) and hopefully set up an appointment for next week. Her medical resident and her medical partner stopped in to see me - that was unexpected and appreciated! Once the results are in we can determine which line of chemo to start next.

I had a whole parade of people there too. My favorite husband, my mom and dad, and my medical student. I sure felt important ;)

I'm glad that part is done, and now look forward to a treatment regimen. Look out ovarian cancer - I think this hospital and team may just have your number!

Finally scheduled!!

Finally, my needle biopsy is scheduled! I never thought it would actually happen (well, it was tentatively scheduled for last week, but I kind of knew that wasn't going to happen).

Its funny. I have been waiting for this since March 4. My old medical group couldn't seem to get it together to get me the referral. I switched, and saw my new medical group pcp on Tuesday of this week. So, I get the referral from my NEW medical group on Tuesday. I get the DENIAL from my old medical group today... Something is not right with the sytem!

Oh, and I got a bill today, for my medical records that I asked be sent to my new doc. Nice.

I AM SO GLAD I SWITCHED GROUPS!!

Plus my new group assigned me my very own medical student! OK, he is a first year student, but they are trying a program where the student follows the same patient throughout their medical experience. It is supposed to teach them the patients perspective. Poor kid. He looks so young and innocent. He has no idea what he just got himself into... :)

So, my biopsy is on Monday! I want to dance!! I want to sing!! (I want to puke a little too...) Lets get this thing rolling.

Needles

Tomorrow I go to have my port flushed at my oncologists office. When you have a port, it has to be flushed every three months in order to ensure it is functional, and that it does not become clogged. I will also be telling the staff and my oncologist that I am changing medical groups. I am sorry to be leaving such a kind staff, but I am not sorry to leave that medical group! However, I hope that I am not going to just run into the same problems at the new medical group. We shall see.

Also, I got a call today that they are STILL waiting for the insurance approval for the CT guided needle biopsy of my liver. However, we did set up an appointment for it, for next Thursday. If they won't let me have it done at the university, I'll just wait until April 1 when the new medical group kicks in. I mean, I've waited this long already, whats another week or so? It sounds interesting. I'll be under twilight sedation, and they will insert a needle into me. They will keep putting me in and out of the CT scanner, to make sure that the needle is going the right way. They said it takes about an hour, and that they keep you there for about four hours afterward to make sure nothing important got punctured, except for what they wanted to puncture. ;)

The biopsy will tell us if the suspected cancer on or near my liver is still ovarian cancer, or if it is some other type. That will determine what type of chemotherapy I will get. Doxil or Gemzar or Taxotere - oh my! There is a certain poetry to chemotherapy drug names.

I am in great spirits though. The clouds and fear have lifted - I have not been plagued by them for several weeks. I asked God for a miracle. I don't know if I will get it or not, but the simple action of asking seemed to lift the paralyzing fear from me.

I just wanted to give you all a short update (that really was not so short). I'll let you know when I know, if the needle biopsy will continue as scheduled or not!

Living with cancer

The title says it all. The gynecologic oncologist said that from here on out, I will likely have cancer. The PET scan showed three areas -near my liver, on my colon, and in my upper abdomen. Those little cells sure get around! There was also a suspicious area in my neck (the scan said it could be the thyroid, or vascular). She was not convinced that was cancer.

She said the chemotherapy that I was previously on, did not seem to do a thing to stop or slow the cancer. I am platinum resistant (became immune to the effects), or refractory (never had any effect). What a waste! I hate that I was poisoning my body for no reason.

She said that we can fight it with chemo - all different types of chemo - to hopefully keep it from growing, and possibly shrink it. I would stay on one type of chemo until the cancer decides to ignore it, and then try another. But the implication is that chemotherapy will be my life.

She wants to biopsy (needle biopsy) the mass near my liver, I guess to ensure that it is ovarian cancer, and not a cancer of some other name. I will be switching my insurance to her hospital, where any future chemotherapy I get will be under her direct supervision. I only hope that my insurance company will understand and not be slow to act in changing my coverage.

So, that is where everything stands as far as the game plan. I hope that one of the chemotherapies is especially effective, and knocks this back for a while.

Tonight I am making chili for my company's 'chili contest' that they hold every year. That is more important than worrying about the future -right? ;) In fact, I need to change that title up there to " LIVING with cancer " (because "cooking with cancer" just doesn't sound quite right... ;) )

No answers, more questions

I finally heard from my oncologist about my PET scan results. There was nothing really definitive though. He said that there are three areas on the scan that are suspect. The aforenoted mass near my liver, and two others in the "abdomen". Hmm. My abdomen is a large place. ;) I wish he would have narrowed it down a bit.

He did not actually look at the scan, just the technicians interpretation of the scan. I had the scan sent to the gynecologic oncologist that I am seeing on Tuesday, so she can hopefully interpret it with an expert eye.

I am hoping for surgery first, then chemo again (not that I am wishing for chemo - but I think you know what I mean!) I just want this out of me (again)! Sometimes they don't do surgery, but start a new chemo regimen instead. Possibly Doxil, or Gemzar (boy, I am really learning the lingo.) I hope that radiation won't be required. I have a fear of radiation. Shoot me up with all the deadly chemicals you want, just don't 'zap' me.

The upside of this, is that there were no spots (or at least the oncologist didn't mention any spots) in my lungs, or other far reaching areas. If these 'spots' are cancer (likely they are), they are staying put in my abdominal cavity for now.

So there is the update. Nothing enlightening. No game plan yet. I really hope to have more answers on Tuesday.

Still waiting

Still waiting for results from the PET scan. I don't know if its psychological or not, but I feel increased pain in my right side, where the mass is supposed to be. I'm hoping its psychological... :)

In other news, I won't get to see the same gynecologic oncologist that originally performed my surgery. Apparently he is not with the 'group' for my insurance anymore. They referred me to a different person. However, the new doc is one that I saw last year for a second opinion, and I really liked her. So I hope that this change is for the best. I am happy that I have insurance, but I really hate the huge run-a-round and all of the hoops I need to jump through! I have an appointment with her for next Tuesday.

So I'm waiting, and working, and worrying, and wondering what the future holds. Those must be the four "w's" of ovarian cancer! ;)

Continue to remember me in your thoughts and prayers please, and my favorite husband too!